I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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