Just fell off a train. Bad.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
