I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I am full of burrito and curiosity
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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