How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
