I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize