my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
