I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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