Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Randomize
