glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
