you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
