Jerry, you need to find god
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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