I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
