Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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