i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
