My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
When are your genitals available?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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