have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I have fence marks all over my body
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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