Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
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