The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
