Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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