i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
