We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
