Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
so let's talk penis.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
