Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
