you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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