The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Randomize
