its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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