I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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