i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
