hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize