The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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