I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
