it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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