Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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