Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
