She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
