i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize