I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
