You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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