if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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