so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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