just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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