Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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