Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize
