it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Operation Purity has been aborted
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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