How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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