You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
