I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
