how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
