Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I have already put on my inside pants.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
