I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
operation harelip BJ is a go
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
